Nothing is easy, but then again who wants nothing?

February 21, 2020


                                      Mandatory Screening for New clients


All my trusted friends and loyal readers know how my mandatory screening is famous for delivering interesting scenarios and stunned admirers. Truth be told, it is not my uniqueness in approach but rather the exceedingly low standards of London's escort / erotic massage industry that is making men uneasy with transparency. I am simply looking after my safety and comfort while generously displaying the sense of pride I take in what I do. Most men worthy of my attention appreciate it very much, some find it slightly annoying but still participate and the rest have too little respect for themselves to even bother. Perfectly designed to vet non-suitors with almost immediate effect, my compulsory screening works like a charm. Since implementation, I've had a 100% success rate in great experience and top quality new clientele. 



                                                    The 'Salt of the Earth'



A behavioural pattern that I've observed, over the years from men with a slightly too extensive escort experience, is entitlement. Perhaps not entirely their fault, but they have come to believe that the only thing they have to offer is what every lady wants - money. For all those individuals, the fact that a provider could be more interested in good experience and safety over money is without a doubt, breaking news.

 It's actually not that unusual for people to be resistant to change, despite the benefits. We could trace such resistance even throughout human history. Pointing out, however, that if one has no change of attitude and approach, would never have a change of experience, it would not only be favourable but also fair. When looking for a quick fix, zero effort appointments, finding poor escort or erotic massage experiences, fake profiles, lack of attentiveness or an IQ of 60 should not be coming as a surprise to the 'Salt of the Earth' clientele.



                                                            The serious part



Am I holding too high of an opinion of myself?

 No, I don't hold any strong opinions these days, as I am vividly aware opinions are just a step away from ignorance (#Special K lessons), but I do value highly myself and that would not change regardless of someone's financial status or personal generosity. Bending the rules is not impossible, but definitely non applicable to random strangers. Lowering my standards is not out of question, but only when it comes to restaurants ( you can take me to a non-Michelin starred ones) There is also a great possibility of mellowing my sarcasm and replacing my harsh, sometimes, honesty with diplomacy, but that would not change my seriousness in business execution. Most importantly, there is 98% chance that you will have the time of your life, but then again you have to go through my screening requirements to find out if it's not just false advertising.

Taking your safety and comfort seriously, while not taking yourself too seriously, it has a serious benefit in addition to the seriously fun factor. I am serious, even when jump starting your weekend with a joke.



A man walks into a bar. Upon sitting down a busty blond waitress pours him a drink and asks if he would like some food. He looks up at the menu above the bar it says:

  • Hot dog – $2

  • Cheeseburger – $5

  • Hand job – $10

He asks the waitress, “Miss are you the one who gives the hand jobs?” She winks and replies, “why yes I am.” He says, “Well wash your hands, I want a cheeseburger.”




          Be safe and happy, never look down on everyone......and don't forget t